Walking the Healing Path

What does it mean to be on the healing path?

To embark upon the healing path... for me this started with the thought that perhaps I was not fully "okay." I had a hunch there were things inside of me that were causing me distress or were preventing me from feeling truly happy with my life. I didn't know exactly what these "things" were. Had I processed my parents divorce, the breakups with past partners, and the other hardships that had been on my journey? I was fully aware of my sensitivity and that I would cry a lot. What was wrong? Why was I crying? What was the pain I was feeling that would come through as tears? I was curious.

I felt called to explore more "alternative" ways of healing, while not even calling it healing, but an exploration of what could be "wrong with me." One question I get asked from others is "where should I start and who should I go see?" There are tons of healing modalities, and an almost infinite amount of practitioners to choose from. What I tell people is to see what is in front of you and to follow your curiosity. While there is no real start date to this path, I would say that my first session was with a woman that I had attended a couple of her yoga classes and got on her email list, and through her emails I became aware that she did 1:1 healing sessions. I had no idea what sort of "healing" it was, but I liked her and was curious about it. I booked a session and when we met what was most alive in me at that moment was to talk about a past relationship that despite my best efforts I could not forget about. She walked me through a cord-cutting journey. I went to a new place within myself, had a major insight, cried, and didn't quite know what to think of it. She felt called to lend me a book after our session, and that book was exactly what I needed for where I was on my journey. It gave me the next step.

For me, to be on the healing path is to recognize that along the way of my life, I had been conditioned, and picked up beliefs and patterns that were not representative of my truth. It is to recognize that I had gone through countless experiences that I had not processed, that I was holding onto memories unconsciously, operating from coping mechanisms carefully designed to keep me safe and above all, that I had lost touch with my soul. I didn't know who I was or what I wanted, and there was this sense that I had lost parts of who I was. I wanted to find these parts, and know who I was.

The path of healing is the path of wanting to know my Self, and to actually be my Self. How would I live if I was showing up fully as me? To not live my life according to what society says, or out of fear, or wanting to be accepted, or out of resentments, traumas and pain. This path is the also the path of love. To see myself through the eyes of love, and see others through these eyes too. It is the path of "doing the work." The inner work that transforms. I also want to acknowledge that wanting to "heal" does not mean that there is something inherently wrong with me, or that I am broken. It's less about fixing, and more about recognition, integration, and choosing love. This path is one of questioning everything, and going within the Self.

There is a lot more I could say on the healing path, and the above is only touching the surface. It's complex, with many layers, and won't be the same for two people. It is walked alone, as no one can walk this path for you, but I would say it is best to walk it with others and call in community. And finally, where does this path lead? To somewhere, yet nowhere, but it's beautiful.

Why embark upon this path? I will leave that up to you.

X

Sheps